UK updates 30/9

More rambles!
I know that I just did an update a few days ago, but a lot has happened...including me crying in the back of an Uber.  

• Yesterday was not a good day.  Things have been getting progressively more difficult ever since last week Tuesday, and there’s a very good reason why.  I have not been sleeping well. It’s one of those things where in hindsight you think to yourself, “Well, yeah. Obviously.” But in the moment, your head is spinning, trying to sort out your emotions and this new overwhelming feeling of emptiness. 
• I don’t like to use the word stupid so I’ll say unthinkingly…Unthinkingly, I assumed that, even though I am not longer getting up at Starbucks opener hours, I would still continue to be an early-to-bed-early-to-rise kind of person. I love the early morning hours when no one else is awake; even in the craziness of work, one of my favorite parts of the day were those wee hours when only a few customers were in the store, everything was chill, one could really talk to someone, and the sun hadn’t quite risen.  
• Last Tuesday night, I was all set.  I had spent the day traipsing across London, I had only gotten about five hours of sleep the night before…I should have slept like a log.  But I didn’t.  I tossed and turned all night and felt strangely awake.  Sleep only really came for me around 3am, which is not like me at all.
• Only it IS like me.  I fell asleep at 3am (UK time) which was 9pm (US time).  That’s normal for me.  This is where stupid, er, I mean unthinking…this should have been obvious but it took me another two days to realize just why I was struggling to sleep at night.  I didn’t like sleeping in until noon.  I wanted to be a morning person, darn it!  Was it the stress?  The excitement?  My body getting used to a new bed?  Possibly but mostly it was my circadian rhythm. 
• To add to this, while I would love to live each day here like I’m on holiday, I do need to save money.  I’d like nothing more than to hop on a train into London or up to Edinburgh and live out all my tourist dreams, but I can’t.  Responsibility crept up on me and I decided that I should probably be using my funds to buy things like a bathroom rub (boring!) versus a Doctor Who walking tour (fun!).  
• This all culminated yesterday 29/9 when I ended up on the outskirts of Colchester after misreading the bus schedule.  More on that later.
• As far as public transportation goes, I have a lot to learn.  For basically all of my life, I have gotten around via car.  Buses and trains were reserved for vacations and served more as entertainment than actual means of getting from one point to another.  I LOVE that public transportation is so accessible in the UK, but there’s definitely things I don’t understand and am still figuring out. 
• Thankfully, my friend Joanne Cunningham recommended this app (City Mapper) that has helped me immensely in figuring out which train or bus to take.  
• (Again, so much of this will seem self-explanatory but, as someone who has rarely ever taken a bus or a train, it’s a whole new language and I’m doing my best to give myself some grace.)  For instance, the app says that I need to take Bus S1, but there are two different S1 routes: one going to Wivenhoe and one going to Highwoods.  Which one do you want to get on, Deanna?  Well, that depends on what your final destination is!  
• There are usually two “get-on” locations for each stop, as well: one on either side of the street.  S1 Wivenhoe will stop at one (heading towards the university) and S1 Highwoods will stop at the other (heading towards the outskirts).  Which one do you want, Deanna?  How do you know which one you want?  (As lovely as the City Mapper app is, it doesn’t tell me which “get-on” location to wait at so, more than once, I’ve had to make a mad dash across the street when the bus I’m looking for suddenly appeared at the opposite location!) 
• The answers have presented themselves now (there’s usually a sign outside the shelter, or even inside) that lets one know which bus is coming to this location and how long the wait can be.  Also, it helps to just ask people.  I should know by now that just asking a genuine human being will usually get me an answer faster than any app will.  (But I am still fighting off the anxiety of looking like a dumb tourist.  Again, I need to remind myself, I am (essentially) a tourist.  I am still figuring it out.  Give yourself a break, Deanna.) 
• Also: what’s up with the “stop” buttons on buses?  People will hit these things and the driver will continue on for another half a mile before actually stopping!  But the people don’t seem upset by this.  Is this to ask the driver to stop at the next bus stop, regardless of if it's on their route or not?  I just assumed that “stop” buttons meant, “Stop the bus NOW! I want to get off!” but that doesn’t seem to be the case.  
• Anyway, yesterday I got on the wrong S9 and rode it all the way to the eastern outskirts of town.  Realizing my mistake, I simply rode the bus back into Colchester City Center and jumped on an S1, but THAT was the wrong S1 and it took me to the northern outskirts of town!  By this point, I was so tired, I was practically in tears, but I told myself that I’d just do what I did before and ride the bus back into the city center.  If nothing else, I could walk from the city center to my apartment (a 20-ish minute walk).  The bus sat at a stop and I waited for a few minutes for it to take off again.  Suddenly, the driver flicked the lights and announced that this was the last stop on this route.
  “Oh,” I asked sheepishly, “You’re not going back into the city?”
  Nope.  I was stranded.
  I got off the bus and (of course) it started to rain.
  Holding back tears and tired beyond belief, I called an Uber…only the street I was standing on (apparently) wasn’t a street that my Uber driver could reach so the app suggested a nearby street for us to meet up on.  I agreed to it and then spent the next five minutes trying feverishly to find this mysterious road where my driver would be waiting. I ran across the street, dodged through traffic, and through an underpass, all the while messaging my driver with, “I’m trying to get to the meet up point! Please don’t leave! I’m on my way!”
  I eventually found him. 
  I cried the whole drive back to my apartment, and thankfully my driver didn’t say anything. I tipped him extra for leaving me in my misery. 
• Once home, I took a Benadryl (this is no job for Melatonin!) and passed out.  I don’t even think I washed my makeup off my face.  
• This morning I had a 9:20 appointment to finalize my registration with the school, and this was good for me.  It was something early (ish) in the morning that was going to force me up and about.  With the help of the Benadryl, I got 9+ hours of sleep and awoke somewhat refreshed before making myself some coffee.  I am truly hoping that this is the start of a more regular sleep cycle.  
• Speaking of which, I am officially registered as an international student at University of Essex (see my cool lanyard).  Ever since accepting the university’s offer back in February, I have wanted some U of E merch, but they don’t really have a university website.  After registering, I took myself to the official store and got myself some swag.  (Er, I don’t think I’m the kind of person who says swag. It felt weird even just typing it.)  The woman working the store was extremely nice and she told me that she’s taking a trip to the US in October (going to Memphis and New Orleans).  I also asked about Pebbles the cat, half-wondering if he is real or just a myth but she assured me that he is real and she sees him nearly every day.  Pebbles and I are going to be best friends!  Just you wait and see!  (For those who don’t know, the Colchester campus has a “campus cat” named Pebbles.  He’s a stray who lives in the nearby woods (apparently) and wanders onto campus to beg for food and will even attend a lecture or two.) 
• I don’t want to make it seem as though this past week has been completely awful.  I did get to see my lovely “wife” Melody last week Friday.  We went out to dinner at a lovely pub (where a drunk man tried to start a conversation with me and I ignored him).  But the coolest part of the day was visiting an indoor zoo that’s located directly across from the hotel where Melody was staying.  Melody got to hold a skunk!  (See all the pictures.  The “zoo” is more of an animal sanctuary where somewhat exotic animals (everything from alligators to rabbits) who were once pets can live out the remainder of their life in safety.  My favorite part was the bird section where I got to meet three blue and gold macaws (yay Jojo!  IYKYK.) 
• Last Friday also had its fair share of public transportation woes. As I was coming home from Loughton, it was announced that someone had fallen on the tracks near Colchester and thus there were major delays.  My train to Hythe was cancelled at the last minute TWICE and I ended up just taking a different train to a different station and just Uber-ed the rest of the way home.  The biggest issue was that my phone was dying, and I was freezing.  
  
• Melody has since moved into her housing and apparently has foxes living nearby.  
• My classes don’t technically start until next week so I’m still just lingering at the moment which (as I learned last week) isn’t always great for my mental well-being.  I need to be doing something; as tiresome as work can be, it gave me a purpose and got me out of the house.  For this reason, I “gifted” myself the opportunity to go into London tonight and see a play at The National Theatre.  After so many years of watching only from their streaming service, I’m excited to be in the real venue. 
  Aside from that excursion, I will use my time to set up a UK bank account and apply for a part-time job.  Ideally, I’d like to work at a theatre so I can make some connections.  For everyone who asked if I’d just pick up where I left off and start working at Starbucks again, I have to tell you that Starbucks is not nearly as big of a deal over here as it is in the US.  Yes, there’s one on campus but Caffè Nero and Costa Coffee are definitely more prevalent than the Siren.  
• Also, the vegetarian and vegan options over here are amazing.  I can get vegan (not just vegetarian but VEGAN) options at Burger King.  Do you know how amazing that is?  I had a Vegan Royale the other day and it was super cheap and super tasty.  11/10
• Also, I love Tesco.  That’s all.  I just really like it. ​

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